That is a great question. And one that is difficult to determine. You need to ask yourself a lot of things. What do I like in a person? What DON'T I like in a person? What am I willing to live with in a relationship? What will I absolutely NOT put up with in a relationship? The answers to these questions will help guide you when looking for your Mr./Miss Right.

Understand that finding the right person takes time. Don't get impatient. Hurrying something just because you want it never works. When the instructions on the pizza say bake for 17 minutes and you take it out in 5, what do you get? A luke warm sloppy mess. Relationships are the same. You've got to let them cook.

Let's say you've met someone you think you could be interested in.
What do you do?

Well, after the first time you meet you probably have a desire to see him or her again. You try to set something up, you talk on the phone and agree to go out on a date. Now-- begin a friendship. Do stuff together like go to a show or share a sport you both like. If you think this person is a serious contender for your affection, begin meeting each other's family and friends.

While all this stuff is happening you may discover your dream person isn't exactly what you thought. Now you definitely need to consult your list of dos and don'ts. If the differences you've found are not something you want to deal with, get out now. Don't make the mistake of thinking the other person will change because they love you. That only happens in fairy tales. The truth is, what you see is what you get. That's why it is so important to take time to get to know the other person.

If you decide your differences are things you can work through, then proceed. Mutually agree to learn more about the other's interests. Discuss your differences on the big things like she likes to be early, he is never on time; she can't wait to have children, he doesn't want any. Discuss your goals in life. Understand who each one is and where each is going in life. Work through each difference until both of you are satisfied. (Remember, the other person is not going to completely change for you just because they love you.)

OK, you've gotten to the point where you still like the other person in spite of your differences and you've worked out the issues that matter to each of you. Now what? Make a decision to take your relationship to the next level. Discuss how you would partner in marriage. How would each of you handle finances, children, in-laws, holidays, living quarters and more. When you get to a point where you are both comfortable with your decisions, the next step is your engagement.

Planning a wedding can be a trying time. This is still a trial time to make sure Mr. or Miss Right is truly the one. When you make it to the wedding day still wanting to spend the rest of your life with the other person, you are ready for the lifetime commitment of marriage--and the reward it brings. Once you say "I do," you can. You are free to enjoy sexual intimacy with the person you are willing to go through anything with. What a great experience to know that you are sharing something that no one else in the world has ever had--you.

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